His birthday. a month late.

 

So Brecken's birthday was over a month ago and I just now realized that I never posted his party. This kid. I could write a book about him and all the things that come out of his mouth. Just this morning he went and laid on the couch and said, "Maaaa, come cuddle me and stare at the beautiful Christmas tree." I mean who could turn that down. But as soon as I laid next to him he said "Maaa! I need your phone to make me feel better." right. It's all about priorities.

 

And remember the life size Angry Birds display John built? I posted it on Instagram. Well we set it up in the garage for his birthday and the kids were entertained for hours and the gobs of candy and chocolate I shoved down their throats made me an obvious hit with their parents.

 

My kid is four. Four! Which makes me feel old and it makes me really appreciate the miracle and resilience of kids because I've never been able to keep a plant alive yet we've somehow mastered parenting which is kind of ah-mazing.

 

Happy (late-late) Birthday kid, you're cool and I really like that.

 

ten useless facts plus one.

 

Have you seen that viral post going around Facebook? You know the one where you get a random number and then you tell that many things about yourself. If you're on Facebook I'm sure you avoided liking at least 50 posts....give or take.

 

Here's ten utterly useless facts.

 

1//I get nervous when I'm not talking. Kind of like I have to be talking or else things get awkward and then things get really awkward anyway because I'm usually talking when I'm not suppose to.

 

2//I once dreamt I was married to Eli Manning. The following week he won the Super Bowl. Coincidence? I think not. (No worries John, your man candy job is safe).

 

3//I have a thing for chapstick and colorful vintage books and globes AND shoes.  I also have a thing for ugly sweaters. Isn't this shirt from Skip N' Whistle awesome? Ugly sweaters year around they said! I agree. Basically, what I'm trying to say is I have a lot of "things." John would whole-heartedly agree.

 

4//I always wanted to be the karate kid. still do. it's weird I know. But if that doesn't pan out I would like to go back to law school.

 

5//I like to cook, but these hands are useless when it comes to baking.

 

6//I once met the Russian version of Oprah...or so they say.

 

7//Restlessness is commonplace for me. I always have this nagging feeling like I'm missing out on a party or event. It's always been that way. A life of travel  would be ideal, but I married a homebody so I'm sure you can imagine how that worked out.

 

8//Waffles and pancakes taste like crap. Along with cantaloupe.

 

9//I have always wanted to live on a street with sidewalks. When it finally it happened I missed gravel roads. go figure.

 

10//I have a thing for food too. Good food. Food that tells a story and not only presents itself with love but you can tell it was made with love. yeah, that's that type of food I like. Obviously, McDonalds doesn't fall under this realm, but my favorite bar does, it's delish.

 

11// I don't follow rules or even my own rules.

 

Hey. It's also CyberMonday and SkipN'Whistle is offering 20% off from now until Christmas. They have some stellar ugly sweaters and shirts...think dinosaurs-meet-Santa. Just use promocode: SANTA

 

shop away my friends. shop away.

Busy good. It's a thing.

 

I've been struggling lately. Struggling to keep my house clean. Struggling to manage the chaos. Struggling to wean myself from breastfeeding Addy (yes, I'm the problem). Struggling to stay awake come 2:30 in the afternoon. Struggling to make dinner every night. Struggling just to keep on keeping on.  But I'm not complaining, I'm just struggling (which is that considered complaining)?  Relay For Life is starting again and I'm in the full swing of recruiting new committee members and while working on some fun events with the school and I'm also on the city planning board so all those years of schooling and multiple degrees are finally getting put to good use on writing grants.  Have you ever written a grant? It's this conundrum where you have to be scientific and fact-based while still  having some semblance of human emotion. yada yada'd lobster bisque (quote that show). I'm boring you...

 

 Anyway, I guess I'm just starting to feel useful again. Like I have a purpose (don't hate me. I know. Mothering is a purpose).  The stay-at-home-mom gig is such a blessing, but it often seems like the most thankless job in the world so to finally be in the world again, working with adults, not having food thrown at me and carrying on a conversation that doesn't involve talking about Lego towers and Angry Birds is kind of refreshing too.  I'm mean, Lego towers are pretty cool though.

 

Have you ever felt like you were just good though? Well we're kind of there right now. We're good busy and living life in perpetual stage of cluttered toys and days old laundry still sitting in the washing machine, but we all seem to be our happiest right now. Except if someone would like to do the laundry and maybe the dishes I wouldn't object, I may even throw in the vacuuming because, well, I'm a giver. naturally. ;)

 

 This is pretty typical. Her distraught face//His, "what? it-wasn't-me" look. You know. typical. But we're still good.

18 months

I'm digging 18 months. Hands down it may be my favorite age yet. You're so squishy and mobile and you still let me lay slobbery kisses all over your face. You only say "No!" (emphasis on the loudness) and a whole slew of animal noises, but you're smart beyond your years (bias, maybe?) No matter the task you go into full-blown action to accomplish it--picking up your toys, putting on your shoes, grabbing diapers, and climbing into your high chair are all tasks you do with ease. Which is so mind blowing since your most common forms of communication are hand tugging and pointing.

 

I just love you so much and the older you get the more I yearn for time to freeze. You're a picky eater, but if we catch you in the right mood you'll eat about anything. Your favorites right now are candy (shameful), bananas, quinoa, soup, and you have this real hankering for French Fried Onions out of the can (you know, the kind that go on green been casserole) I mean you really like them. And walking. wow. You run, but your little body has to play catch up with your legs so your movements are often jumbled as you topple over your own feet. I like it though, and even more I like chasing those little legs of yours around the living room. AND horse-y time. I think you spend more time riding around on my back which is fun and all except when you brother decides he wants a ride too...I'm not that big of a person so I'm sure you can imagine how the story plays out. And when it comes down to it  I cherish the quite moments in our life when you and your brother crawl up in my arms and we read book, after book, after book (we read a lot of books),  it's in those moments that you gently scratch my hands or run your fingers through my hair (which is ironic because when I feed you your little fingers attach my chest like you're just about to win on a scratch card).

 

Before you I imagined a whole house of boys, the ruckus of little trains and airplanes (wait. that still happens), but now my days are filled will combs, and tucking teddy bears into piles of laundry...and secretly, I kind of want more girls. oi' vei! (I'm sure your brother would disagree).  Even though your words are limited your eyes always seem to be watching and learning and yesterday I caught you with a stool pushed up to the bathroom counter while you teetered on top of it trying to put on makeup by yourself. And like an old pro you knew exactly where to use blush and what brush was needed on your eyes, heaven help us!

 

And if being a girl wasn't enough you've really taken the bull by the horns when it comes to your emotions. Your little heart is so big and the slightest raised voice or stern look your way often sends you into a fit of tears. A hug and a kiss is all it takes for you to resume back to your normal self again. I'm not much of a crier, but I totally get the wearing your emotions on your sleeves. It seems that sometimes the only way you know how to communicate is through your larger than life emotions. Your Dad jokes that the teen years will be rough, I hate to inform him that they could be even more than that.

 

Gosh, I don't even know where to begin and end when it comes to describing my love. I just have so many hopes and dreams for you. You still have so much life ahead that I can't even start to comprehend where life will take our family and because of that I am so thankful for every day we have with you!  

 

 My baby girl, you are loved.

 

Love, Mom

bang. bang. bang.

 Lemme just tell you that my hair really should have a blog of it's own for how much it's discussed, or at least have it's own name because it sure has it's own personality.

I always wanted long flowing hair, like the kind of hair that other people would swoon over. Rapunzel-like hair seemed a bit ridiculous so my eyes were always drawn to a Kate Beckinsale meets Blake Lively style which seemed to fit my fancy.  I don't have a lot of things going for me in life, I'm short with wide shoulders so being a model was never in my book, but my hair, it was made for great things. I've always had volume (and lots of it) and curly hair AND if you could have seen it in it's prime it was so thick and lush (not sure it's the right word to describe it). So naturally, I was set up to do down right amazing things with my hair!

Then my story took a turn when I had kids and the curliness became unruly and the long beautiful locks because straggly with patches of thinness and I began to rapidly produce unruly little one-inch hairs that never seemed to go away (or grow). So I toughed it out for a few years thinking my hair would eventually return to it's once stellar grandeur. But alas and as most sad stories tend to go...it didn't. Insert: tears.

 Anyway, five inches later and a full set of Zooey Deschenal bangs, yes baaaarngs, I am finally getting accustomed to my new style. I was a basket case for a few days with a mild case of cutter's remorse and a whole lot of guilt for chopping what little (and did I mention slow-to-grow) length I once had, but I did it and as the old saying goes "there was no turning back."

And if my own reaction wasn't enough to cause me fits at first it was John's reaction that sent me over the edge. Why are guys so bad at hiding their horror? seriously. I'm sure the ombre' took him for a loop, but his dissatisfaction in the bangs seemed to be the hot topic at the dinner table for oh' lets say seven days. He's adjusting now, except for those rare exceptions in the morning where I look like the love child of Edward Scissorhands and Beetlejuice. Again, my hair has it's own personality.

So that's it, the bangs are here to stay and I'm beginning to transition the way I wear hats, and headbands, AND beanies, and I've even learned to use bobby pins again. And I'm kinda starting to like them.

Your thoughts? On bangs of course. yay? nay? And I guess ombre'. What's your thoughts on that look too?